Confessions of a (WAY) Less-Than-Perfect Housekeeper

OK, so "less-than-perfect" is probably putting it mildly...I hesitate to even venture down this road...

Don't get me wrong; I'm not a hoarder or anything. I'm guessing that most of you who regularly visit our home wouldn't say I'm a horrible housekeeper...I hope not anyway. My pride makes sure to pick up the house, clean the bathrooms, and vacuum as much pet hair off the couches as I can before guests arrive. But don't arrive a couple hours early... I don't think I'm a horrible housekeeper. I maybe just have a different way of going about things than some. On a scale of 1 to 10, I'd say I'm maybe a 5 1/2 or 6...

I used to think the reason my house always seemed to be somewhere between a major and minor chaotic state was that I was a mother at home with 3 preschoolers - then my kids all went to school...

It's not that I don't know HOW to clean - my mother taught me like the best of 'em - I grew up not being able spend the night at friends' houses on Friday night because I had to be home for Saturday morning cleaning. My sister and I knew how to scrub floors (on our hands and knees), dust (by taking everything off the dresser first), clean bathrooms (not just wiping off the counters, but polishing the faucets, wiping out drawers, toilets, tubs/showers),vacuum (using the attachments to go near the floorboards), sweep, do dishes, take out the garbage, do laundry...well you get the idea...we were cleaning the whole house by ourselves in the 2nd and 4th grades! I put my own children to shame (which is a topic for another day).

I must admit, once we got our own rooms, my propensity for "disorganization" began to rear its ugly head. While Martha's room was neat as a pin - drawers and closet organized - my room was "less-than-perfect". Let's just say that only on rare occasions would you be able to tell that my room was carpeted. I cleaned my room as a teen much the way I clean my house now. I'd get tired of the mess and all of a sudden decide to go all out - picking up, dusting, organizing, throwing, vacuuming, washing bedding and curtains - it was all or nothing. Anyone who knows me well knows that I tend to be an "all or nothing" type of person. It's something I've been working on...

So...on with the confessions!

#1 - I don't dust. Oh I will if it gets REALLY noticeable, but this is maybe only once every 3 months or so. Or I might just do the living room or areas that are readily accessible to visitors. Only if I'm doing the "ALL" of the "all or nothing" thing will I dust the way my mother required me to as a child. Why? So little reward for the effort. In general, I just don't notice dust.

#2 - I let things build up. Like laundry...during good weeks I either do a load or two every day or do it all twice a week. This was not a good week.

The clothes on the counter and in the basket are clean. The clothes on the floor are not. I also have a pile I just moved out to the family room to fold...and there's another basket of dirty laundry upstairs from the girls' room.

A little bit of a mess doesn't bother me (unless I was just in "ALL" mode). I'm just not worried about a few dishes on the counter or papers on the desk or some PJs on the floor...

Here's what the kids' bathroom looks like today after they've left for school. Not too big of a deal...

A few things on the desk...getting there...

It doesn't take long for a bunch of little messes to become a minor disaster. Case in point - my girls' bedroom...this was spic 'n span last Tuesday...


No, I didn't open those drawers...

Plenty of room in the closet. And it looks like this only after I picked up all of this from the floor - that laundry basket was empty 3 minutes ago...



#3 - My timing is off. I'm absent-minded. I procrastinate. I don't have a sense of cleaning urgency until I need to. I'm often doing last minute cleaning before someone arrives - even before my husband and kids get home from school. A lot of the time the clean dishes sit in the dishwasher until I've got plenty of dirty ones to refill it with. The "dirty" sheets often stay on the guest bed until I'm preparing for the next guest to arrive. (Hey, how "dirty" can they be when you only sleep in them one night?!) The wet towels and suits are often left in the swimming bags (even though the children are supposed to take care of this right away) until we're repacking the swimming bags for the next swim practice.

#4 - I make piles. When there are really big messes that aren't mine, I just get a laundry basket or box (or the floor of my kids' rooms will do) and start containing the mess. There's no reason why our whole family should suffer for the messes of a few. I'll pick up an entire level of our house (we have 4 levels) and just put the things that aren't my mess into a basket. Then, when the kids get home from school, they have to take care of what's in the basket. It does end up being less overwhelming for them, but if I forget about the basket, it can backfire. When Sarah is searching for PJ pants that were left on the bathroom floor last night and they are in the bottom of the basket under the American Girl doll clothes and hair clips and Magnetix and homework papers and crayons and blankets and books that were laying around the house, we have a problem. It's time for bed! We don't have time to put all that stuff away now!

So while I'm sometimes overwhelmed at our entire family's propensity toward being slobs, I'm encouraged to be able to say, it's OK. There are certain things that really bother me. I like for my bedroom to be clean. I don't like to feel grit on my feet if I walk across the kitchen floor with no socks. Toothpaste must be rinsed out of the sink after brushing your teeth. Overflowing garbage drives me nuts. But, it's OK. 5 years ago, I wouldn't have been able to say that ever. I stressed out over not having my house up to my own inner standards of cleanliness. Today, it's more important for me to spend some time in the Word to begin my day. I want to play ping-pong with Hannah. I want to read books to Sarah. I want to help Ethan with his homework. I want to sit on the couch in front of the fire and cuddle with my husband. I want to watch a movie. I'll be the first to admit that I could be more diligent in keeping my house in order. Sometimes, I just feel lazy. I'm about 50-50 as far as it really bothering me or couldn't care less - there's that "all or nothing" thing again. Right now, it's OK...tomorrow I might have a problem with it... I'd better get off the computer now. I need to do some cleaning :o)

The Biggest Losers

Dana and I have entered into some friendly weight-loss competition with a group of people from church (mostly). This competition started on January 1st and ends on April 1st. Like many people at this time of year, we venture out to the YMCA as much as we can to work up a good sweat and hopefully work off hundreds of calories. We're not following any specific kind of diet other than trying to eat healthy and to watch our portions. So far...so good...we're both LOSING!

A couple of clarifications before I continue...I do not enjoy exercise; never have, probably never will. The whole getting sweaty, breathing heavy thing just doesn't do it for me. I was never an athlete (or even very coordinated), and regular exercise was never a part of my growing up. We worked hard and played hard, but never consciously tried to exercise. That really is probably the way it should be (I'll bet those pioneer ladies were rarely overweight). But anyway, I digress... I've struggled as an adult to maintain any sort of exercise regimen. I like to think I'm active (at least in good weather), but that just doesn't cut it anymore in my post-child-bearing, mid-30s, still-like-to-eat-like-I'm-a-teenager body. I recently saw the scale hit a number that it never has for me (even during pregnancy), and it was a huge wake-up call! This is not at all about vanity or wanting to be a certain size; I'd just like to be here when my children are having children. I'm sick and tired of feeling sick and tired. I am really motivated to shed some pounds! (I'm so cautious in even writing this post as I feel like I've been motivated before and then given up so many times) For some reason this feels different.

Here are a couple of things I've learned about myself as I try to lose weight (again...or maybe still...)

1. I'm extremely motivated by a measurable goal. Dana and I are doing the "Lazy Man Iron Man Triathlon" through the Y. This means we have 5 weeks to complete 2.5 miles of swimming, 112 miles of biking, and 26.2 miles of running/walking. Surprisingly, this totally motivates me to get to the Y everyday! I don't want to fall behind and then have to work that much harder at the end so I've got to keep up. While I don't enjoy exercise during the process, I really do feel good when it's over - physically I mean - and I'm sleeping better at night too. Need to focus on those benefits. I think when the 5 weeks are over I might try to complete it again in 4 weeks the next time...By the way, nothing but respect for my children who do close to 100 laps in the pool every swim practice. Right now, I can barely do 3...pathetic, I know.

2. I do better without being on a "diet". I've tried Weight Watchers, the Maker's Diet, some "smoothie, fruit, and salad" thing, and probably some others I can't remember. They all did what they were supposed to do, but I am just not motivated to obey long-term food rules or point counting. I think if I'm going to say good-bye to these numbers on the scale forever, I've got to figure out something that is going to work for me personally.

3. I'm motivated by the competition and camaraderie of The Biggest Loser. The prize for the top 3 is money. That would be nice. I'm not going to quit or give up. What would people think?! I regularly see fellow "Losers" working out at the Y and it's fun to hear how everyone is doing. It so often seems like it's a secret when you are trying to lose weight, but I've enjoyed having it out in the open and being able to encourage and talk a little smack to each other.

4. This is a heart issue for me. I REALLY like food; somehow I've just got to fall out of LOVE with it. Only God can help me with that. I had started running to food when I should be running to Him. I know that sounds cheesy, but it was frighteningly true for me. I've been focusing on yielding to the Still Small Voice of the Holy Spirit. I've experienced conviction, brokenness, victory, failure, forgiveness, relationship, peace, empowerment...Jesus is wonderful - He sure knows me better than I know myself.

By the grace of God, may this not be just another attempt, but a lasting change. I'll be sure to post an update on April 2nd!

A Humbling

You may have noticed that my last post ended rather abruptly...

We were getting close to being late for swim practice so I was in a hurry when backing out of the garage. I turned the wheel to avoid the van mirror from hitting the side of the garage and over did it...ended up in the snow bank next to our driveway. Tried to correct it by pulling forward, but as most of you know our driveway is very steep and it had been raining so it was slippery. I couldn't pull forward and just kept sliding downhill. I thought I'd turn the wheel just perfectly and gun it to plow through the snow bank (I was in a hurry you know), but all that did was plow me even further down the driveway into a good 4 foot bank. Totally stuck, I did the typical female spin-your-wheels thing even though I wasn't really expecting it to work. I did it more out of frustration. So I got out of the van and started scooping (hey, maybe I could get it out before Dana got home...I don't think any neighbors saw me...no one would even know), but it was quite apparent I was going nowhere. Dana arrived home about 3 minutes later, chuckled at my half-hearted attempt at removing the van, and pulled me out with his truck.

We were 20 minutes late for swimming. It never really does pay to be in a rush...

I should have taken a photo to show you just how stupid I really was, but even the most humbled of us have our limits :o)

Below Average

After seeing a disturbing report today about how much media and electronics (TV, movies, video games, computer, cell phone, music, radio, newspapers, magazines, etc.) the average child in America is exposed to every day (anywhere from 8-12 hours!!!), I feel a need to examine our own time. Here's how the past 36 hours or so went over here...

6:30 - 7:45 Get children ready for school, breakfast, finish homework, coats and boots on, etc. (no media)
7:45 - 3:00 Dana at work (computer - approx. 2-3 hours - mostly just for work); kids at school (probably have at least some computer time there); Nedra has quiet time, does a few loads of laundry, goes to Bible Study, lunch with a friend, and runs errands while out (radio while driving around - approx. 30 minutes)
3:00 - 5:45 Girls have friends over and bake cookies, play dress-up, and "talked", Ethan plays Wii (45 min.) then reads a book (60 min.), Nedra cleans up, checks e-mail and news on internet (20 minutes), and prepares supper; Dana exercises at the Y (I think he swam so he couldn't listen to the iPod like he usually would)
5:45 - 7:45 Dana and kids to AWANA at church (book CD in the van on the way there - 10 min.), Nedra blogs (30 min.) and exercises at the Y
7:45 - 10:30 Kids get ready for bed, Dana meets for Men's Bible Study and prayer, Nedra empties dishwasher, does more laundry, reads (60 min.) and does an electronic Sudoku game (30 min.)
10:30 - 6:30 Sleeping
5:45 Dana leaves to donate plasma (probably listens to iPod, reads a book, or messes around on his laptop (90 minutes)
6:30 - 3:00 Much the same as the yesterday; Nedra on computer in afternoon (45 min.)
3:00 - 4:15 Homework, snack, practice AWANA verses, read books, blog (20 min.), leave for swim team and exercise at the Y

We're not any super-family over here. We're just trying to keep ourselves somewhat organized and healthy (and hopefully God-honoring in the process), but basically just keeping our heads above water... I know we sometimes overdo it with movies, etc. It concerns me to think about the "average" child being SO inundated with media. While some of it may be entertaining or maybe educational or relational at best or hopefully at least harmless, I fear that much of this "media" is mind-numbing at best and probably corrupting the minds of our young people at worst.

Believe me, we watch our share of movies, play our share of video and computer games, spend some mindless time surfing the net, and entertaining or numbing ourselves with junk. We are not immune to the lie that the abundant life takes place during our leisure time. However, I'm happy to report that our family appears to be WAY "below average" in this area. God help us...

Just for Fun

Random quotes that I find inspiring, humorous, or thought-provoking. Note that the posting of a quote here doesn't necessarily endorse the author of the quote; in fact, I strongly disagree with some of these folks' general philosophy on life. I don't even know who some of them are. However, I do still like these quotes and agree with the truth or humor I find in them. Please forgive the cheesy dog/cat quotes...I have to admit, I'm a cat person.

"He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose." -Jim Elliot
"Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear - not absence of fear." -Mark Twain
"A ship in the harbor is safe, but that's not what ships are built for." -Unknown (to me anyway)
"Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens." -Jimi Hendrix
"Political correctness is tyranny with manners." -Charlton Heston
"A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on." -Sir Winston Churchill
"Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes." -Jack Handy
"The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good." -Samuel Johnson
"Blessed is the man, who having nothing to say, abstains from giving wordy evidence of the fact." -George Eliot
"Dogs have Owners; cats have Staff." -Unknown
"Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later." -Mary Bly
"There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast." -Unknown
"He who has a 'why' to live can bear with almost any 'how'." -Friedrich Nietzsche
"Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted." -Albert Einstein
"Love is the only game that's not called on account of darkness." -Thomas Carlyle

Any thoughts?

Come, Let us Bow Down in Worship Before the Lord our Maker. Ps.95:6

Sometimes I look outside and it just takes my breath away! God's creation is so wonderfully diverse. "For since the creation of the world God's invisible qualities - His eternal power and divine nature - have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made..." Romans 1:20 How true!

These past few mornings we've been greeted by an outdoor winter wonderland. The correct name for this phenomenon is "hoar frost". I'll just call it God's handiwork. This is one of my favorite displays of His glory - each little branch, leaf, or blade of grass coated with beautiful white ice crystals. It reminds me of how my Great Big God cares about tiny little me and all the details of my life.

And how awesome is it to wake up after the first big snowfall of the year? There's always a month or so of brown - the splendor of the autumn leaves is no more, the grass is dying, it's cold - and then God works his magic... The gently falling snow (I like it when it falls in great big wet snowflakes) is like God's purifying of our lives - taking what is dead and dirty and covering us with His righteousness. All of a sudden it's marvelous outside! The cold isn't quite so cold when there's snow to play in. Looking out across the yard and seeing a blanket so smooth and white - nothing like it! Even a good old-fashioned Minnesota blizzard has it's advantages - can you say "snow day"? Snuggled up by a warm fire drinking hot cocoa...

Another one of my favorite things is to lay on the ground on a quiet, cloudless summer night and stare up at the stars. The vastness of the universe is just incredible, yet my God holds it all in the palm of His hand! You can get dizzy just contemplating it. "When I consider Your heavens, the work of Your fingers, the moon and stars, which You have set in place, what is man that You are mindful of him?" Psalm 8:3-4 When I was younger, I always searched for the big and little dipper. How fun that God would arrange the stars that way! I miss this...it's just not the same in town...

And THUNDER! It frightened me as a child. Now I delight in it. It's a declaration of the power and strength of God! "Do you have an arm like God's, and can your voice thunder like his?" Job 40:9 This huge, loud powerful noise - sometimes a rumble, sometimes a crack - I feel it in my chest. It's thrilling! God is to be feared (respected), yet that fearful God has my back! It's the safety of knowing the Source of all power and strength is on my side. I tremble at His glory, and yet He is my Refuge.

A rainbow...I was at Target this summer and while going through the checkout; everyone was abuzz about the rainbow outside. Grown men, children, young and old... When I walked outside, people were stopped dead in their tracks admiring the full double rainbow in the sky. The pavement wet, the smell of rain (another one of my favorites) in the air, the sky still dark beyond the rainbow, but the sun was coming out! Everyone stopped to revel in the work of God's hand. "Like the appearance of a rainbow in the clouds on a rainy day, so was the radiance around Him." Ezekiel 1:28 Hope, joy, peace...in the midst of trial.

The list could go on and on... Sunsets - Oh the beauty! Mountains - How grand! Animals - How diverse! The trickle of water over the rocks in a forest stream...the roar of a great waterfall...the ocean waves rhythmically going in and out...the sound of birds chirping in the morning...a gentle breeze...winds that rock huge oak trees...the color in a wild flower meadow...white fluffy clouds floating across the sky...menacing storm clouds rolling and twisting...the warmth of the sun on your face...the stillness of -20 degrees...the sizzle and heat waves of 105 degrees...all declaring the glory of God! Mightier than the thunder of the great waters, mightier than the breakers of the sea - the LORD on high is mighty. What is your favorite thing about creation? How does it declare the glory of God to you?

For the LORD is the great God,
the great King above all gods.
In His hand are the depths of the earth,
and the mountain peaks belong to Him.
The sea is His, for He made it,
and His hands formed the dry land.
Come, let us bow down in worship,
let us kneel before the LORD our Maker;
for He is our God
and we are the people of His pasture,
the flock under His care.
Today, if you hear His voice,
do not harden your hearts...
Psalm 95:3-8

December Highlights from the Kiddos

Grandpa Patenaude, Grandma Patenaude, and the Christensen Family (Dana's sister) came to our house for Christmas. Sarah: I'm hugging Grandpa. He gave me a soft butterfly shirt and a striped shirt for Christmas. I'm wearing a tank top because my Grandma gave it to me for Christmas and I was hot 'cuz I was dancing.


Hannah: I look funny. Sarah: We are at the YMCA pool swimming. Elysa is fun and funny. She is playful and loves to dance with me and Hannah. Ethan: I don't have anything to say about that one because it's not me.

Ethan: I LOVE to open presents! This gift was LEGO Indiana Jones and Speed Racer for the Wii. Me and Evan like to wrestle. I love Evan. We have fun together. Hannah: Evan is a cool cousin because he's a boy and he's wild and all my other cousins on the Patenaude side are pretty much girls except for Thor.

Hannah: That is my most favorite cousin ever because she is cute and she likes to play with me and Uncle Dana. Katelyn doesn't like it if she doesn't get her way, but I still love her. Sarah: She is loving and likes to dance with me and Elysa and Hannah, but she is a crazy dancer. But very very cute!

Hannah: Look at Katelyn! Ethan: Evan's hand is on her head. Hannah: I thought my hand was on her head. I can see Elysa's stomach. Ethan: I thought that was her arm for a second. Hannah: Look at Evan's face... Sarah: I can't believe I'm not even looking at the camera. Hannah: Oh, Sarah, we weren't looking at the camera because Aunt Jessica was taking a picture at the same time so we were looking at her.

Sarah: What I have to say about this - Katelyn and Uncle Brian are swimming at the YMCA. We played games and had a lot of fun there.

Ethan: Grandma!!!! She is FUN! She got me awesome Christmas presents! There is weird stuff in that World Record Book, but I like it. Hannah: (singing) She always has gum in her purse. Sarah: Grandma is an awesome and loving grandmother. I also like her 2 cats, Spock and Spooky.


Nedra: These pictures are small because I got them off Martha's Facebook page because I actually forgot my camera when we went to Rushmore for Christmas. I was LOST without it!
Ethan: We went on the sled behind the 4-wheeler! We got a LOT of snow. It snowed the whole time we were there. Hannah: It was AWESOME! Sarah: I don't have anything to say about playing outside. I got some good presents. My favorite one was an American Girl doll bed that Ethan and Grandpa made for me. It's very sparkly and fancy! Ethan: We got to use spray paint to paint them; it was really cool! It wasn't like I expected. Hannah: I saw Grandpa carrying the paint out of the shop because I asked if I could drive the lawnmower. Ethan: Great Grandma got 90 roses for her birthday because she turned 90! Hannah: ...on December 23rd. Ethan: You don't need to put that!





Ethan: The hotel in St. Cloud was SWEET! Hannah: We played pufferball. The pool was awesome because we played toypedo rescue. Ethan: And it was warm too. Nedra: We went there for a swim meet and Grandpa and Grandma got a hotel room. Hannah: Sarah looks like she doen't have any clothes on! Ethan: Yeah, she does because you can't see the straps of her swimsuit! Ha ha!! Sarah: Don't say that! It's making fun! Nedra: I think you look adorable here Sarah. Love your smile and sparkly eyes.

Hannah: We got a ping pong table from Mommy and Daddy for Christmas and we didn't even have enough paper to wrap it! Ethan: It was awesome! Hannah: I'm trying to beat Daddy so he'll take me out for dinner at my favorite restaurant. Sarah: I don't really care about ping pong because I'm not very good.


Sarah: I learned to dive in December by Kristen teaching me how to swan dive off the edge and then I could do it off the block. It makes me a faster swimmer! This is the first meet where I dive in.
Ethan: I'm glad that Grandpa and Grandma came to watch us. They said I was awesome. That's my friend, Josh, at the top. Hannah: Yep!

Ethan: My arm looks really bony in that picture because of the numbers! Nedra: What about your ribs?! Ethan: Well they ARE bony; my arm just LOOKS bonier than it really is.
Hannah: This is my friend, Marcella. Ethan: It looks like Hannah has a beard! Hannah: We went sledding one day. Ethan: My friend Nick was there too and we went off a jump at the bottom.
Hannah: Daddy makes fire every single day. Ethan: Almost... Sarah: The fireplace keeps me warm. I like to sit by it. Ethan and Sarah (in unison): Rudy and Selah like to lay on the ledge.

Sarah: Sledding is fun. I like to eat the snow when I'm down to the bottom. It's hard work to get back up the hill. Ethan: Don't eat the yellow stuff!!!! Sarah: Or the brown stuff; that would be even more gross! Ethan: No it wouldn't! 'Cuz it might taste like pizza! Ha ha!! Sarah: Hannah looks strange. Ethan: She looks suspicious like she's staring off at something in the distance...see her eyes? Hannah: I love eating snow when I'm sledding because I get really hot when I'm climbing up the hills and it cools me off...
Ethan: THOR!!! Thor is cute! Sarah: This is the cutest baby ever!!! He is very very smiley and loves to do the airplane.